I'M A FELLOW
HSP
I remember when I first discovered Dr. Elaine Aron’s work on high sensitivity: I was curious, elated, and confused at the same time. I wanted to understand more: her research, her papers, and the experiences of people who seemed to experience the world in ways that felt very familiar to me.
For the first time, there was language for something I had experienced throughout my life but had never quite been able to name...perhaps just like how you felt when you first discovered high sensitivity.
What do I need, and what do I want?
One of the things I recognise most clearly in myself is how highly attuned I can be to other people. For a long time, I was very aware of what other people needed, wanted, or were feeling. I could anticipate it, adjust to it and accommodate it almost automatically.
What I was much less aware of was myself. I could spend so much energy understanding everyone else that I didn’t always stop to ask:
Recognising myself as highly sensitive helped me see this pattern differently. It didn’t suddenly solve it, but it changed how I lived.
It shaped how I structure my days, how I schedule my work, when I give myself time to decompress, the environments I choose, how I manage relationships, and how I recognise when I have taken on too much.
I still overextend myself at times. I notice it sooner, however, and I find my way back more quickly.
I also have a much clearer sense of the things I need in my life to feel well and whole. I am less willing to negotiate those things simply because someone else wants something different from me.
“As a psychologist, I believe there is something reassuring about having lived through the territory you're helping someone navigate.
From Engineer to Psychologist.
My first career was in engineering and the corporate world. I spent more than twelve years there. At that stage of my life, I was driven by achievement, being seen, and creating financial security.
I worked hard, built a career and, in many ways, achieved the things I had set out to achieve. Gradually, however, I began to feel that something was missing.
It wasn’t that my life was bad....It simply wasn’t fulfilling me in the way I had hoped it would. I had a growing interest in people: in how we think, why we behave the way we do, what shapes us, and what happens beneath the things we say and do.
Underneath that was a quieter question that became harder to ignore:
Is this really what I am meant to be doing with my life?
The answer didn’t arrive all at once (although I simply wish it did). For a long time, I tried to pay attention to what kept returning: what felt meaningful, what continued to pull at my curiosity, and what I could not quite ignore.
Eventually, I knew I had to try something different.
So I went back to university and began the process of becoming a psychologist. It was a significant transition. I had to step away from an identity I had spent many years building and become a beginner again. There was uncertainty, doubts, and moments of anxiety.
Yet, becoming a psychologist was not simply a career change. It was a move towards work that felt more meaningful to me.
The Psychologist You Will Meet.
People often describe me as direct and to the point. I tend to see through the "fluff" fairly quickly.
I notice patterns easily, and from there, I ask questions. If I think something important is being avoided, I am likely to bring it into the room. Directness, for me, does not mean a lack of empathy. It's a way of facing things that need to be examined.
Given that, I want the people I work with to feel understood: not judged, analysed from a distance, or given generic advice.
I also want our work to go somewhere. For me, therapy isn't necessarily endless conversations about why life is difficult. Understanding matters, but so does doing something with that understanding. I want us to have a sense of where we are going and to actively work towards making your life better.
At my peaceful haven at São Martinho do Porto, Portugal
A Little More About Me.
Alongside my psychological work, I teach psychology at university in the Netherlands. Teaching is a passion of mine and keeps me close to current research. I'm also involved with research related to Highly Sensitive People. I value that discipline deeply.
With that being said, I don’t think human experience always fits neatly into the frameworks we have developed to understand it. Many HSP's (and people in general) experience intuition, deep insight, and a deep sense of inner knowing.
I also don’t think we need to dismiss these experiences simply because they are difficult to measure. I believe in listening to that sense of inner knowing. There are simply things that have occurred in my life that I will never be able to explain with science.
And so, I am content to live in that liminal space between believing in something bigger than us, and honoring what science shows us. With that being said, I often take the time to connect with my intuition. And I also try to use it as a guiding principle in my life, and in the work that I do.
That brings me to my faith.
My faith is also an important part of my life.
I don’t impose a belief on anyone.It is personal to me, and it influences the values I try to live by: service, fairness, humility, and respect.
My view at São Martinho do Porto, Portugal. Sitting on the balcony, drinking a cup of tea in silence, looking out at the horizon, and listening to the softness of the waves, The stillness encompasses me. This is heaven.
Outside of psychology, I value quiet. I like time alone, soft instrumental music and having space to think, not only about my own life, but about people, purpose, and what it means to live well.
There is the less philosophical side of me.
I enjoy strength training. I lift weights, and I enjoy pushing myself physically and finding out what my body is capable of.
There is something about physical effort that I value... the discipline of showing up consistently, doing something difficult, and discovering that your limits are sometimes further away than you thought.
Physical activity grounds me, balances me, and makes me feel more whole.
In my life now, it is a non-negotiable.
My Academic & Professional Background.
My professional journey has taken me from engineering and the corporate world into psychology, clinical work and university teaching. I continue to teach, learn and develop my psychological practice because I believe good psychological work requires both experience and intellectual curiosity and the humility to keep questioning what we think we know.
FOUNDATION ACADEMICS
BSc. Industrial Engineering
Advanced Diploma in Counseling
Master's in Applied Positive Psychology & Coaching Psychology
Doctorate in Clinical Psychology (Psy.D)
SPECIALIZATION IN DOCTORATE
Family Systems and Relationship Therapy
Brief Therapy
Cognitive Behavior Therapy
Sexuology
Alcohol and Other Addictions
Positive Psychotheraphy
SPECIALIZATION POST DOCTORATE
Highly Sensitive Person Therapist (Through Dr. Aron Elaine- leading authority on HSP's)
Dialectical Behavior Therapy
Emotion Focused Therapy
BOARD MEMBER
NIP- Nederlands Institute of Psychologists (Guiding board for psychologists in the Netherlands)
Keynote presenter/speaker for the NIP for budding psychologists-2024